Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
