I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
