your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
where does the pee come out of this thing
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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