if you like me you must not know who I am
are you so shy because you have an std?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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