have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
