Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
