But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
