filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
