so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Less talking, more tequila
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize