I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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