she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
