You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Just pee around me
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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