found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
