Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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