...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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