We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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