party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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