so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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