too bad you live with your parents still
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
