Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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