didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
