so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
