wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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