Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
