Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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