So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
i think im in europe. pls send help
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
