I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Randomize
