at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
