i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
