I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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