i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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