Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
tonight lets celebrate not being married
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
