I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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