All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
