Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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