Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
