He is like the real live version of the state fair..
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
