Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize