I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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