that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
