He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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