The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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