According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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