Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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