I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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