if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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