So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Randomize
