I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
