It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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