His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
